Britain’s schools are in crisis – thank goodness this head teacher has the answer

We are caught between a rock and a hard place. We don’t want children excluded from school. We know expulsion only exacerbates alienation and low self-esteem.

Just under 4,000 pupils were excluded in 2025. There were 335,671 suspensions. What, we worry, is to become of these youngsters separated from their peers and labelled ungovernable? How will they ever come close to realising their full potential?

Of course, we’re equally passionate about acting swiftly to limit the damage wreaked on our children’s education by disruptive classmates. We deplore violence against teachers.

We are horrified at uncooperative students monopolising teachers’ attention. When we hear that diligent pupils are scuppered by the appalling behaviour of unruly kids, we clamour for the disruptors to be speedily removed.

Ladies and gentlemen, the cure for our predicament is alive, well and currently in charge of Caldicot School in Wales.

Dickensian in name and nature, Alun Ebenezer rescues failing schools with a combination of discipline, tradition and old-fashioned common sense.

Referred to by critics as the “head from hell”, to my mind, Mr Ebenezer is more like an anti-mollycoddling angel.

He took over Caldicot after teachers went on strike over student violence and, within a year, achieved dramatic improvements in exam results, morale and behaviour.

Mr Ebenezer’s methods include same-day or Saturday detentions, zero tolerance for defiance, strictly enforced uniform, and a fatwa on pupils skulking about in the medical room unless they are referred there by a teacher.

My favourite tool in his spectacularly effective box, however, is his ingenious strategy of inviting the parents of disruptive pupils to sit next to them in the classroom during lessons.

Just imagine it! Jones Minor is all threat and swagger, threatening staff and running amok in maths. He is cock of the walk, unassailable in his menacing campaign to torture the teacher and distract pupils.

Suddenly, Mr Ebenezer appears at the classroom door with Mr and Mrs Jones Senior, who are embarrassed, furious and should be at work, and ushers them into neighbouring desks.

Naturally, Mr Ebenezer’s plan works a treat. Jones Minor transforms magically into a model child. He sits quietly, pays attention, and, goodness gracious, starts to learn a few things. In fact, importing parents is such a soaraway success, Mr Ebenezer has never had to ask parents to make a second visit.

Appoint Alun Ebenezer Roving Education Problem Solver. Deploy him in struggling schools. Teach and implement his methods nationwide – and hurry up about it.