'Family found out my salary – now they want me to pay for everything'

Your salary is private to you, and it’s nobody else’s business. So if someone asks what you earn, you may just awkwardly laugh it off and change the topic quickly before others get involved.

But when one woman and her husband, who are in their 30s, used a mortgage advisor, who was also one of their family members, their salaries were suddenly common knowledge in their family circle - much to their dismay.

“Since this info has come out, my family’s behaviour towards us has completely changed”, the woman admitted, and she and her husband really wasn’t happy about it.

She shared that she and her husband have a combined income of around £200,000, and they are “child-free and living in the city”.

“At all family meals/events since, no one puts their hands in their pockets and we are expected to pay the entire bill”, she took to Mumsnet to explain

She continued: “Snide remarks are made about how we hid the fact we’re ‘rolling in it’, and we’ve been guilt tripped about how we should be helping people in the family out who are struggling...

"Whilst we do live comfortably, we are far from millionaires. I don’t feel that we are in the position to be supporting the family financially, nor should it be expected.”

The woman explained that it’s almost got to the point where spending any time with family is a “nightmare” as they’re “always expected to pay” when they see people.

She said that she didn’t know how she could handle it, and asked people for advice. Some people were blunt in the replies, with one saying: “Easy - cut every f**ker off.

“And report the family mortgage advisor c**t and hope that they lose their job for breaching GDPR with your income details.”

Another added: “You’re not being unreasonable, but you shouldn't have used someone in the family for something so personal and if they acted in a professional capacity they shouldn't have shared that info.”

Someone else shared: “You probably need to start cutting ties with a lot of your family. I would start by avoiding family meals or any situation where you might have to pay them proceeding from there.”

A fourth said: “Sounds like a London salary. Considering the national average is about £26,000, you're not rolling in it, but 6 figures is pretty rare. Your family are acting like vultures though, and I'm sorry about that.”

A fifth Mumsnetter fumed: “Cut them all off - and report your mortgage advisor. They shouldn't be sharing personal financial details, especially with your wider family.

“This is why high earners are often cagey - people don't know our exact household income and we still get similar treatment! It's horrible your family are treating you like this, to be honest, it would be an easy no contact for me.”