'My son’s death has given me a purpose'

It broke us all in one way or another,” says Debbie Turnbull, as she describes the day she lost her 15-year-old son Christopher to accidental drowning.

“Just after 4pm, my husband John came in from work and immediately asked where Christopher was,” she says.

“I told him Chris was at a local beauty spot he liked to go to in Capel Curig, near where we live in Wales.

“But John had heard on the car radio someone was in trouble in the water there and he just said, ‘he’s dead’.

“I looked at John, he was grey, and I knew in that second that Christopher was gone.”

It was August 14, 2006, and the police were soon heard knocking at their door in Rhos-on-Sea, ­confirming their worst fears.

“But I knew the day Christopher was born, that he wasn’t going to be here for long,” says Debbie, 65, who describes herself as spiritual. “I told my best friend that, and we’ve never forgotten.

“Christopher came here for a reason – and what I do now is that reason,” she says.

Debbie now helps to prevent other families experiencing similar heartbreak, through her non-profit organisation River and Sea Sense (RASS), which educates young people about the risk of open water.

Her message will be even louder on July 25, which is World Drowning Prevention Day.

In May, she received an MBE from Princess Anne for her services to water safety education for young people and their families, during a “beautiful, emotional day”.

“Princess Anne spent quite a bit of time with me. I will hold dear the experience for years to come,” she says.

“It’s almost 18 years since Christopher drowned, and I hope this award powers me forward to achieve the things I have felt I couldn’t in the past because of a lack of confidence,” she says.

This includes a book she’s writing about Christopher, called From Loss to Legacy.

“Receiving an MBE is wonderful, but I’m about what I can do to support others as a Trauma Informed Practitioner and the lives I can save through drowning prevention,” Debbie says.

Dawn Whittaker, the Chair of the National Water Safety Forum (NWSF) and co-author of the UK Drowning Prevention Strategy, says: “I have lost track of how many thousands of children Debbie has spoken to about water safety in the 18 years she has been educating and campaigning, and she has undoubtedly saved lives, influencing behaviour as well as educating young people about risks.

“Education is key to saving lives,” says Dawn. “Open water is not inherently dangerous, but it does have risks if the person is jumping in from height, swimming after drinking alcohol, chooses a higher-risk location such as weirs or tidal water with rip currents without preparing and doesn’t understand the risks of cold water and the impact it can have­physiologically.

“It’s also really important to recognise that around 40 per cent of people who drown every year did not intend to enter the water – they may have slipped or been trying to help someone else or a dog.”

The most recent figures from the Water Incident Database (WAID) show that in 2023 alone there were 236 accidental drownings in the UK.

Inland water, such as rivers, canals, lakes, reservoirs, and quarries, continue to be the leading locations for accidental drowning, accounting for 63 per cent of deaths and over half of the deaths were a result of recreational activities.

The figures also show a gender divide – 83 per cent of the fatalities are male.

Debbie’s son Christopher was one such young man. A strong swimmer, he slipped off a ledge, fell into the river Llugwy and was dragged into an ice-cold whirlpool, a result of heavy rain days earlier.

Christopher’s foot became trapped under a tree root, and an autopsy later revealed he had died from cold water shock and had suffered a minor heart attack.

“At every presentation, whether a school assembly or a keynote speech, I begin with saying that learning to swim is not enough,” says Debbie.

“Christopher was an amazing swimmer and played rugby, but he still lost his life to lack of knowledge as to the dangers of open water.

“I believe my work through RASS is my life purpose and I feel honoured to be able to deliver this work with my son’s guidance.

“I don’t need to feel a physical presence to know Christopher’s around. And over the years I’ve had so many signs, often when I’m questioning if I’m doing the right thing.

“Angel Bay, near Llandudno, one of his favourite places, was where we took his ashes. I headed there for peace of mind once and hundreds of white butterflies settled on me. They were on my head, my shoulders, and my arms, I could feel them. It was so unusual, people were staring. And then they all flew away as one.

“On the day of the inquest we had the biggest rainbow you’ve ever seen appear, and six weeks after his death, when we had a fundraising walk for the mountain rescue team, there was a huge pulsating rainbow the whole time, even though there was no rain.

“Christopher is in my heart, and I know he was with me when I picked up the MBE too.”

While she has channelled her loss into crucial ­education and saving lives, Debbie says: “I have struggled with deep grief over the years and had to train to heal myself.

“But I am my own best friend and accept that I will be healing from my own challenges for the rest of my life.

“I have an amazingly supportive husband who grounds me, who I love more than he’ll ever know, and close friends whom I trust with my life.

“Over the years I have met so many wonderful people, they show me love and support when times become really tough, often via social media.

“I’m also deeply grateful that Christopher’s friends never forget to message me every anniversary, birthday and special day.

“I’m also regularly in touch with other people who have lost their children both through drowning and other reasons. We are there for each other no matter what.

“I’m grateful that I have a purpose in life, and the main thing I’ve learned is that above everything, you must absolutely live for today.”

• For more on River and Sea Sense, visit riverandseasense.com and follow @debsbarmyarmy on X