Stars lack a little sparkle: Last night's TV reviewed
MY FATHER was a few decades into his marriage before he realised that my mother dyed her hair.
The All-Star Mr & Mrs contestants for this year including ex-football manager Harry Redknapp
This can, in part, be put down to his bad eyesight and his general inability to notice things.
But it was more to do with how he and my mother lived.
They worked very long hours in separate worlds.
My mum was responsible for the home and the children.
My dad, like many of his generation, spent little time observing what went on domestically.
ITV's All Star Mr & Mrs seems not just outdated, but fundamentally flawed
It was only when he began to work from home that he saw the habits of the household and his wife close up.
He’d have done badly on Mr & Mrs but probably no worse than most of the contestants.
The world has changed since that show was a prime-time hit, changed enough for All Star Mr & Mrs (ITV) to seem not just outdated but fundamentally flawed.
There’s always a pleasure of course in seeing celebrity couples and wondering whether they bicker over the remote control like the rest of us.
The meat and veg of the show however is people answering questions about their other halves.
More to the point it is, or it was, men showing how little they knew about their wives.
Back in the Seventies you’d watch Len from Cannock get some detail about Hilda’s diet profoundly wrong and derive some joy out of the thought of the ear-bashing Len was going to get on that long drive back to Cannock in the Ford Consul.
There are still men who know a woefully small amount about their other halves, of course, but last night’s male guests, actor Jesse Birdsall, football manager Harry Redknapp and singer-songwriter Jack McManus, were never going to be among their number.
ITV's high-octane three-part drama Prey came to satisfying end
Nor are any modern celebrity misters for the simple reason that, unlike the common or garden misters of yesteryear, they aren’t getting up at six to go down a pit.
Celebrities work of course and work very hard but I don’t reckon that many are on nights or spend the bulk of their free time in the all-male atmosphere of the local pigeon fanciers’ club.
It’s a rare event in All Star Mr & Mrs for anyone to get anything wrong.
It would also be a rare event if, for example, all the contestants on Mastermind got the same score.
Equally dull, too.
The problem with a high octane three-parter like Prey (ITV) is that you have at least two weeks to wonder whether it’s remotely plausible.
During those two weeks, I began to think there were ample reasons for prison warder Dave, played by Philip Glenister, to stop listening to escaped prisoner Julie, find a policeman, tell him what was going on and bring an end to the whole nightmare.
Philip Glenister as David Murdoch in ITV's Prey
That was why I now think the writer had the fugitive pair handcuffed to one another until the final act.
It wasn’t a nod to that great chase movie The 39 Steps. It was just so Dave couldn’t give Julie the slip and do what any right-thinking person obviously would do.
Suspecting the handcuffs still weren’t quite enough, they slipped in a scene where a foster mum reminded us how manipulative Julie was as a child.
That was meant to reassure us, more or less after the events, why the events all made sense.
They still didn’t sadly, although they culminated in a thrilling chase and a satisfying end.
I guess if you call your show Prey, that’s all you really need to deliver.