Carrie Symonds will come a cropper sooner rather than later, says VIRGINIA BLACKBURN
So a big hello, then, to Carrie Symonds, the official First Girlfriend and she who has brought Boris to heel. She’s been around for ages, of course, and has appeared in this space before now, but matters have taken a delightful new turn with the news that her past foreign travel had banned her from getting a Stateside visa.
Boris Johnson: Carrie Symonds waits outside number 10
In other words, the Prime Minister may have a significant other who could not accompany him to visit our greatest ally. What could possibly go wrong? Much has been made of Carrie’s strong personality (there have been hugely enjoyable hints from her exes that when it comes to rows with her current paramour, she can give as good as she gets) but she is now shaping up for another juicy role: the embarrassing family member (sort of) who crops up regularly to give the PM a headache.
You could say that, with his father and sister, Boris already has enough embarrassing family members not to need another one.
But we’re so used to them that we hardly notice as the Johnsons continue well into middle age with sibling rivalries that most of us cast off in our 20s.
What we need is a bit of fresh blood.
And in Carrie, we might well have it. one of the many reasons Theresa May’s hold on power tumbled into death by dullness was not just that she couldn’t deliver Brexit but that she didn’t have to cope publicly with an errant family member, thus eliciting the sympathy vote.
And there have been so many.
Tony Blair had his larger than life sister-in-law Lauren Booth.
When she wasn’t commenting publicly about how power corrupted Tone, she was converting to Islam, appearing in a hijab and wreaking all manner of havoc.
In her case, it was no doubt trying to get attention from her older sister Cherie, but it didn’t half make the rest of us laugh.
Then there was dear old Terry Major-Ball, who looked like a jollier and plumper version of his younger brother John.
It was he who tried to save the family gnome business and wrote a book about growing up in the Brixton family home.
He became quite the ubiquitous media personality.
While there is no doubting the affection between the brothers, you could practically see the then PM flinch as his sibling hove into view.
Mrs Thatcher had her son Mark. never did the country warm to her so much as when the silly ass got lost in a desert, while simultaneously slightly hoping he would never be found.
Nor is there any shortage of toe-curling potential among our friends across the pond.
Jimmy Carter had his hard-living brother Billy, who loved a drink, a drink and then another drink, in that order.
Bill Clinton had his half-brother Roger, who had a few local difficulties in the form of convictions for cocaine possession and drug trafficking.
In 2001 Bill granted him a presidential pardon. Sounds like the act of a loving brother to me.
And then much closer to home we have Piers Corbyn, the brother of you-know-who, who is highly dubious about climate change and, it is said, supports President Trump.
That’s quite a roll call for Carrie to live up to, but I have high hopes.
Anyone involved in environmental issues is bound to come a cropper sooner or later (see the hundreds of celebs lecturing us about reducing our carbon footprint from the comfort of their private jets).
And, like her beloved, she has a past.
Boris has been spectacularly lucky in that most of his conquests have – so far – not spoken out.
(I can think of one in particular who may well be planning a book.)
There have, however, already been rumblings from one of Carrie’s exes and, with any luck, there’s a lot more from where that came from.
Fasten your seat belts, folks.
It’s going to be a bumpy ride.